articles on wellbeing

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Eye Exercises Some people have a problem getting their head around the idea of eye exercises, and not so long ago it was considered to be a new age fad with no scientific backing. New research, however, has proved that bad vision isn't always caused by genetics; lifestyle and environment can play a major part in the health of our eyes.

Seaweed Supplement The health benefits of Seaweed or Kelp are huge, but taking the supplement is all a matter of taste.

How to Cope with Information Overload With modern technology we not only have access to, but are bombarded with information. A great deal of this is negative and causing stress. find out how you can deal with information overload.

In Pursuit Of Happiness Stop stressing about life and where you are. Take some tips and set out in the pursuit of happiness.

The Incentive to Quit Bad Habits Just knowing the reason why a habit is bad is not enough to give it up, or you would have done so already. Right? So what will make you give up a bad habit?

Getting to Grips with a Healthy Lifestyle. In a perfect world we would all be eating the right food, exercising, sleeping well and just generally enjoying life.

Moving On After Breast Cancer. Breast cancer affects everyone in different ways and depending on the severity of each case, the recovery period varies greatly.

How and Where to Meet Eligible Men So you're a woman looking for an eligible man. The bad news is so are millions of other women.

Candles Have you noticed how many candles are on display in just about every store you visit these days?

What is Life Coaching? Life coaching is a productive and results orientated dialogue between a coach and their client, on an issue specified by the client. That may be the definition, but what is it?

Who Needs a Life Coach? A few years ago, the term �life coach� was still pretty new to most people, and it was hard for some people to get their head around the idea.

Choosing a Weight Loss Programme For anyone thinking of buying products or services related to weight loss, here are a few simple guidelines to help you get the best value and performance from your choice.

Lose Unwanted Kilos Weight loss isn't just about looking good, a healthy body weight is crucial if you want to enjoy good health and longevity. A fit for life diet encompasses more than just the food you eat, it becomes a way of life.

Goal setting Goal setting isn't something most people want to hear about. Typical comments are �Why do I need to write it down when it's all my head?� Good point, but think about it, how much other stuff is in your head, and how do you juggle it all to keep it prioritized?

Eye Exercises

Some people have a problem getting their head around the idea of eye exercises, and not so long ago it was considered to be a new age fad with no scientific backing. New research, however, has proved that bad vision isn't always caused by genetics; lifestyle and environment can play a major part in the health of our eyes.

Man is naturally a hunter, and the eyes of a hunter are designed to seek out and identify at some considerable distance. It is a known fact that people like farmers and sailors who spend a lot of time looking into the distance often retain good eye sight well into old age. In a natural environment we exercise our eyes all the time. When we look at the horizon, for instance and then look at something close by, our eyes or automatically refocus. When we are doing this all the time, our eye muscles retain their elasticity and strength.

The tiny muscles that control our eyes are just like any other muscle in our body, they need to be exercised regularly. Constant use and exercise means the muscles will remain supple and strong. Unfortunately, most people when they start to suffer from myopia reach for the eyeglasses. This is a good short-term solution, but is very damaging in the long run. The minute you put glasses on, the muscles stop working and the eye lens stiffens as their job is being done for them.

This is rather like going everywhere in a car instead of walking. Your Doctor would advise you to exercise instead of taking the car. When you visit the optician though he will prescribe glasses and tell you eye exercises won't work.

Our environment also has a lot to answer for when we consider some of the causes of nearsightedness. The increasing use of computers and DVD's, either in the house or the workplace are a major cause of vision problems. Computer screens are made up of thousands of pixels. The eyes cannot focus directly on to each pixel, so they need to focus over and over to keep the picture sharp. Over time this causes strain and tension on the eyes. The American Optometric Association has labelled this condition, �computer vision syndrome�.

Staring at a computer screen for any length of time restricts the blood flow and freezes the energy and muscles. Anyone working in an environment such as IT should be aware of the potential damage they could be doing to their eyes. The good news is that just five to 10 minutes spent on eye exercises every day can have a marked improvement. Get into the habit of looking away from the screen at regular intervals and if possible, look at the most distant object in your environment.

Aging causes the lens of the eye to harden and the muscles to tighten. For this situation there are special optical exercises and vision improvement techniques that can help to regain the elasticity and strength, restoring the clear vision previously enjoyed. People now enjoy better health and fitness well into old age, there is no reason why their vision shouldn't remain clear and sharp as well.

At as we become more aware of how eye exercises can help us keep our vision and improve the health of our eyes, doing eye exercises will become an important part of our fitness regime. Most of us take our eyesight for granted and never give it much thought. Only when our eyesight starts to fail do we start to look for solutions, by then it is all too easy to use spectacles as the quick-fix option.

It is also important to remember that proper nutrition and diet play a big part in maintaining good eye health. Certain nutrients such as chromium copper gluconate and lutein can help to keep our eye diseases such as glaucoma and muscular degeneration at bay. Fruits and vegetables which are a bright orange, red or yellow in colour are a good source of lutein which explains the old theory of why carrots are so good for the eyes.

Eye exercises can do much to reduce strain and improve eye sight. It's a natural healthy way to retain vision and eye health. With regular practice there is no reason why you shouldn't retain good vision well into old age.

Seaweed Supplement

For most of us the word seaweed conjures up images of beaches strewn with brown weed, particularly after stormy weather, when it lays in great heaps along the high tide mark. Not so long ago the idea of eating seaweed or kelp as it is also known, would have been considered very strange to say the least.

Times change, however, and seaweed along with many other exotic and unusual foods are now considered practically mainstream for people wanting to improve their health and well-being. Of course some food sources, that we considered unusual have been known to other cultures for centuries and have long been used for health or healing purposes.

The knowledge about plants and their beneficial properties has been handed down through the generations with little or no scientific evidence to back it up. Only now can modern research techniques find out so much more about these plants and pinpoint the sources of goodness they contain.

Findings in recent years, from the research that has been done on seaweed suggest that it is very beneficial in several ways. It is well-known that seaweed contains iodine, vitamins and minerals as well as the by-products, algin and agar. Algin offers good protection against pollution carcinogens and toxins and is also used to normalize bowel functions.

What is not so well known, and is the subject of much more research, is the ingredient known as Fucoidan. One of the major health benefits of Fucoidan is the ability to interact with and modulate the immune system. Modulation in this context is a term describing the process of reducing the extremes of cellular activity. Fucoidan has also shown an ability to regenerate cells, thereby enabling tissue and organ regeneration. This is beneficial for a long and healthy life, since it helps to slow the aging process.

Fucoidan has also been shown to help maintain a healthy blood flow. Tests also suggest that it helps to slow the absorption rate of glucose or sugar into the bloodstream. A slower absorption rate can help to minimize the potential damage caused by high blood sugar levels. Due to the modulating properties of Fucoidan it has also been shown to support joint function and cartilage health.

In layman�s terms these benefits are:

Assisting the immune system and the increase of circulating white blood cells
Enables tissue and organ regeneration thereby assisting longevity
Supports the circulatory system allowing better blood flow and cardiac functions
Decreases the clotting ability of blood
Reduces high blood sugar levels
Maintains healthy levels of cholesterol
Supports proper joint functions and cartilage health
Assists in the elimination of harmful cells
Aids in maintaining proper gastrointestinal function and health
It is a potent antioxidant
Plays a significant roll in maintaining optimal kidney function
It is an aid for low thyroid activity

It would appear that the brown weed washed up on the beaches is beneficial to health in more ways than we can imagine! So why aren�t we eating it by the bucket full? Well some Asian countries like Japan do, and their longevity is renowned. For the western world though the taste of seaweed has stopped the use of this wonder food.

The good news now is we don't actually have to eat it. Kelp or seaweed in tablet form has been available for some time, but even so the taste is hardly palatable. However, with suspended gel technology the manufacturers are able to create a very palatable version.

On a personal note, the more I researched seaweed and its beneficial properties the more fascinated I became. After all the information I gleaned, I am definitely taking a sea weed supplement, and one I can enjoy, not force myself to take. Now that seaweed tastes like apples, why wouldn�t you?

How to Cope With Information Overload.

Due to modern technology, we can now access information from around the world, twenty four hours a day. At any given time, we can contact friends and family wherever they happen to be and keep up with trends and ideas from all parts of the globe.

There is a downside, if we allow it to happen, and that is what we call information overload. I say if, because it really is up to the individual to decide how much information they need and what they want to do with it.

A major part of information overload is the fact that people stress about too many things that they have no control over. Take climate change or terrorism for instance, people are worried and frightened, taken to extreme this sort of stress can seriously damage the health.

So how can we overcome this problem on a personal level? The key is being able to filter information, retaining only that which is of a concern or interest to us. Just because information is available, it doesn't mean you have to take it all on board.

You also need to be very honest with yourself about how certain information affects you and what you are prepared to do about it. If you're upsetting your self about the starving children in Africa, but you are not doing anything about it, then it is a lose - lose situation. You're not doing your health any good, and the starving children don't benefit from your stress levels. This may sound brutal, but the fact is you must make a decision. Are you going to do something constructive, or are you going to file the information and stop worrying?

Not doing anything doesn't mean you don't have a social conscience or that you are uncaring. It simply means there is a situation that has nothing to do with you at this time.

Learn to manage your intake of information so that you've got some control over what you want to hear. For instance, I only listen to the news once a day, I watch a 30 minute news program on TV in the evenings, and that tells me pretty much all I want to know. If there is something that interests me, I will follow through on it, but generally, the headlines are enough for me.

The media have brainwashed us into believing that we have to know everything, and that we should also be the first to know, this simply isn't necessary. The only time you need to know is when information affects you or the circumstances around you. If you're travelling on the highway and an accident up ahead means delays, then information pertaining to it affects you. It may be possible to change your route or make alternative plans.

Filtering information means you sort the information in order of importance. This also means you are best able to retain the facts you need. When you allow your mind to accept all of the information that comes in, you clog up the system. Imagine if you allowed your desk to overflow with paperwork, bills and files all mixed up with junk mail. How hard does that make it to find a telephone number that's buried somewhere in the pile?

Get into the habit of discarding information that isn't relevant. This means you're not causing yourself unnecessary worry. It might be difficult at first but you can train yourself to do it with practice. It is also a good idea not to soak up too much negative information, especially if you're prone to anxiety and stress over certain subjects.

Turn the information age into a positive thing by making it work for you. Take the best of it to enrich your life and learn to be in control, so that you don't get information overload.

In Pursuit Of Happiness.

For those of us lucky enough to be living in the Western world, this alone should be reason enough for happiness. Life is pretty good, economies are booming and living standards are better than ever. Our pantries are stuffed with food, and our wardrobes overflowing with clothes. We've got so much choice it's mind-boggling.

Trouble is, with all these choices, it doesn�t seem to make us any happier or more contented with our lot. In fact the opposite seems to be true.

All this choice only adds to our stress levels. If you don't believe it, watch a mother and her child shopping for breakfast cereals in the supermarket. It's scary stuff.

We are becoming more stressed and disgruntled than ever. So what is the problem? Why are we unable to find happiness or even cope with modern life, when the reality is it's so much better than our predecessors enjoyed?

Part of the problem is that as a society we have become more materialistic and feel a need to acquire more of everything. Our insatiable demands for goods are powering the economic boom. Once on the merry-go-round it is very hard to get off. However, things change and evolve all the time, so current trends, won't last indefinitely.

How does this affect the individual in their pursuit of happiness? What measures can be taken towards a more fulfilled and balanced life. A lot of the time people don't really know what they mean when they say, "I just want to be happy." They don't actually define it in terms that they can relate to. It is just something that is out there. Just out of reach as it were.

Taking time out to come to grips with what happiness means to you is a big step forward, because when you actually know what will make you happy, you can start working towards it.

Take some time to analyse your situation, choose somewhere quiet where you won't be disturbed and think about where you are in your life and what you are doing. A very sobering thought is that you are where you are because of choices you have made in the past. If you are not in a good place you will want to dispute that, but if you honestly think about it , you will find it to be true.

The first thing you must do is to stop playing the blame game. Stop blaming the world, the government, your boss, your landlord, your partner. Once you take ownership and responsibility for your own life, you will get control of it as well. Only then will you be able to put your life on the road to happiness.

Don't confuse short-term gratification with deep-seated happiness. Sure buying a new outfit will give you a buzz, but put a strategy in place for long term happiness. Being miserable or unhappy can become a habit, and deep-seated unhappiness can lead to depression. In this case, though, we are talking about being unhappy in a very general sense

If you're not happy with your life, try to narrow it down to specific reasons. It might be that you hate your job, or where you live. It might only be small things, but enough of them that in the end you just flat-out hate where you are at. The good news is that as you put yourself in this unhappy situation, you can get yourself out!

Think back on your life and see if you can remember a time when you were really happy. What was happening then that made you feel that way and is there anyway you can draw on that experience to help you now.

Ask yourself what you would do if you were told, you could do anything you wanted. Now see if any part of what you really want to do can be incorporated into your present circumstances. Here is an example.

Friends of ours loved to travel and felt caged in their present job. Given unlimited funds, they would travel all of the time, the reality was that they don't have unlimited funds, and have to earn a living. They've been in the hospitality industry for years. So they set up a business where they relieved the owners of other hospitality operations for their holidays. This way they were always on the move, visiting new places and they are now definitely happier.

There will be compromises, but getting some of what you want is an improvement on putting up with something you are not happy with. Given your circumstances, just how much are you prepared to do to change the situation.

If you're in a relationship and your decisions affect someone else, you really need to get together and discuss it

It takes courage to take a good hard look at ourselves and even more to do something about it. Quite often it's not the big things that make the difference, but a series of little things, and it doesn't all have to happen at once.

Happiness is like everything else, it's achievable, but you need to make it happen. The good thing about happiness is, there is plenty of it. So when you find it spread it around.

The Incentive to Quit Bad Habits

We have all got bad habits that we would like to quit. Some might be more noticeable than others and some, like overeating, might be life threatening. Whichever way you look at it, bad habits, no matter how big or small are darned hard to quit.

Bad habits are a multimillion dollar industry. Just think about how much money is spent on quit smoking or weight loss programs. Next time you go shopping take a look at the products available to help you quit biting your nails, and you will see what I mean. If breaking bad habits was easy the industry wouldn't exist.

Well-meaning friends are always quick to offer advice; I mean how hard can it be? You are overweight, just eat less. Problem solved.

The truth is, you don't need to be told why the habit is bad for you. You know all the reasons why you should give up your bad habit, so all the well-meaning advice goes straight over your head. It would be much more helpful if people were more positive about the advice they gave. It is more important to know about the positive, up side of stopping the bad habit. Thinking about good results is more likely to trigger an incentive to quit.

If knowing the reasons why a habit is bad for you, or the advantages of giving it up were all that was needed, you would have given up the habit long ago. What is needed is the will power to make it happen, but how do you get that?

Incentive is what you need and I don�t mean that you could save money if you gave up smoking, that is just another up side to giving up the habit. What I mead is something new, some angle that has not occurred to you before, a moment when the light goes on.

It is often surprising what triggers the incentive to quit. Here is an interesting example. I have just read a story about a young woman who put on so much weight she was virtually a recluse. At a size 26 she was clinically obese ,and age 20 unable to enjoy life. The incentive came when her boyfriend told her that he was sick of leading half a life. He didn't worry about her weight, he just wanted them to get out and enjoy life. That was the trigger. She loved him and wanted him to be happy, so she started a serious weight loss program. Of course she wanted to lose weight for herself, but the incentive was never there. Her boyfriends wish for them to enjoy themselves provided that incentive.

Bad habits that are well entrenched are always going to be difficult to quit, but it's amazing what results people can achieve when something triggers the incentive. Years ago I knew a woman aged thirty who had bitten her nails all her life. One day she saw me apply cuticle cream to my nails. I had just got engaged and was wearing a diamond ring, so was giving my nails extra care. She had also become engaged but was embarrassed about her nails which were bitten to the quick. She purchased some cream, applied it every day and set a goal to have long nails by her wedding day. She could have stopped biting her nails at any time, but it was the wedding that became the incentive.

Reason's are not incentives; reasons why a habit is bad for you is not going to make you quit. Find an incentive and you will stand a chance. Of course this doesn't mean you should carry on with a bad habit until an incentive presents itself. You should always be trying to give up, especially if the habit is damaging your health or well-being.

Once you've decided to quit your bad habit avoid telling friends and family. Especially if you've tried giving up before and failed. If you do feel the need to share, make sure it is someone supportive, you don't need others to gloat if you slip up.

Take a good look at your situation and work out a strategy for dealing with it. Smokers for instance say smoking gives them something to do with their hands; by keeping their hands busy they can lessen the need to light up so often.

Everyone deals with bad habits differently; as far as solutions go one size does not fit all. Finding an incentive that will work for you is the key to correcting bad habits

Remember, you're always too young to start a bad habit and never too old to give it up.

Goal setting

Goal setting isn't something most people want to hear about. Typical comments are �Why do I need to write it down when it's all my head?� Good point, but think about it, how much other stuff is in your head, and how do you juggle it all to keep it prioritized?

Of course it's possible that you're one of those people that can keep whole diaries in your head without writing anything down, unlikely, but possible!

All joking aside when you really know what you�ve got to do and you want to stay on track, goal setting is the key. The simplest form of goal setting is writing a list, do know how much work you can get through if you write a list and prioritize the tasks? The answer is lots; try and you will be amazed.

Of course there is a downside to lists, and that is one of the reasons some people don't like them. If at the end of the day you didn't try too hard, the list will reveal just what you didn't do!

Years ago when our children were young, we bought an old fishing trawler and stripped it down to the bare hull. Then Trish and I and our two children lived in the bare hull whilst I rebuilt it. Every day Trish went to work, the children went to school and I worked on the boat, and every day a list of jobs went up on the bulkhead.

I can still remember how excited I was when I could take my pencil and tick off a completed job. We finally sailed that boat half way around Australia. That was another goal setting journey but I won't go into that here, my point is that without out setting goals and making lists, I don't think we would've made it. It would have been just too hard.

Goal setting is so easy and so powerful that once you make it work for yourself you will never look back. So here's a rundown on goal setting and how to make it work.

Strangely enough you need to start at the end and work back to the beginning. This is because the most powerful part of getting something done is the timeframe. Without the completion date most projects just do not get done, some in fact don't even get started.

So you start with when you would like the job completed. Now depending whether you are working in years, months, weeks or days, come back in your time frame one time unit and ask yourself, �where must I be at this point in time to complete the job on time?�

Keep coming back until you are asking yourself, �What must I complete today for the job to be on schedule?� Did you run out of days? Did you find you should have started this a week or a month ago?

If this is the case, ask yourself, can you get more done in the time? Try reworking it. Can you delegate or outsource some of the tasks? Perhaps the completion date was not realistic and will have to be moved forward.

The detail of the tasks gets greater as the time frame gets closer. For example on your list for 2 weeks time it might just say;

Get links to blog.

Now as you get close to starting this particular part of the project, you might expand it to read;

Find sites to link to.
Write descriptive text for link.
Write email.
Send out email.
Upload link

Each day you start with a list of goals for that day. Next you prioritize that list. If there is nothing to choose between tasks, put the one you least like doing first to make sure it gets done. What you didn�t get done today must go at the top of the list tomorrow.

When setting out your time frame, don�t forget your other commitments or family. Set out times for these first, then work your project around them. You will find you get more support for your project rather than rivalry for your time.

If this is a big project or there are certain parts that you know you are not going to like, reward yourself once you have completed them.

Goal setting is very important, it is one of those 80/20 rules, take the time now to set your goals, and you will be rewarded with a faster smoother running project.

Getting to Grips with a Healthy Lifestyle.

In a perfect world we would all be eating the right food, exercising, sleeping well and just generally enjoying life.

In the real world most of us manage a percentage of the healthy lifestyle and muddle through as best we can with the rest of it. Part of the problem is we are encouraged to think, mostly by the media, that we should be doing everything possible towards a healthy lifestyle, all of the time. For most of us this is just not possible.

Constant concern about what we should or shouldn't be doing causes our stress levels to go up and that negates any good work that we've done. Yes, we should certainly try for a healthy lifestyle, but the two key words are �moderation� and �balance�. By applying these criteria to achieving a healthy lifestyle we won't be beating ourselves up for failing another diet or dropping out of the latest exercise regime.

A common mistake that many people make when they decide to adopt a healthy lifestyle is to try to do too much too soon. They then give themselves a guilt complex when it all falls apart. It is also easy to be influenced by others, when we should only be adopting a healthy lifestyle plan to suit ourselves.

Ah! Did I say lifestyle plan? Do you have one, or do you just try the next thing that is in your magazine or Sunday supplement? By all means read these articles and take them into account as you plan how you want your healthy lifestyle to take shape.

Leading a healthy lifestyle doesn't mean you have got to run a mile before breakfast, eat seeds and think pure thoughts. Great if that's what you want, but for most of us �healthy� means being in reasonable shape, eating our fruit and vegetables and generally having a feeling of vitality.

Decide on your definition of a healthy lifestyle, and then plan a strategy that works for you.

As part of my health plan I decided I wanted to walk in the mornings before breakfast, but there was no way I wanted to get up at the crack of dawn to do it. So I planned a ten minute circuit that includes a short flight of steps and a not too steep incline. I power walked that route every day and felt really good. Sure l wouldn�t make the City to Surf marathon, but I compromised and made it work for me.

Today, much is made of organic foods, but the reality is that organic food is generally more expensive and well out of the range for most budgets. Yes organic is probably the best option, but it doesn't mean that if you're not eating all organic you are not eating right. If you're concerned about general produce, be a bit discerning when you shop. Look for fruit and vegetables that are fresh and unblemished. You should also buy product brands that you can trust. If you shop wisely, you can have a well-balanced healthy diet that won't break the bank.

Basically living a healthy life means looking at your lifestyle as a whole, it is not just about diet and exercise. It is not always necessary to make major changes. Most people know their weak spots, and are happy if they can make a few changes that show results.

A friend of mine was drinking several cans of soft drink a day. She was feeling tired and generally under the weather. When I read an article about the health risk of soft drink I copied it and gave it to her, whereupon she decided to give up the soft drink there and then. A week later she got back to me and said she couldn't believe the difference, her energy levels were up and she was feeling great. Just that one change was able to make a difference and she feels good about the healthy choice.

Sleep and leisure time play a big part in a healthy lifestyle, and for the most part people underestimate the value of good sleep. Our bodies aren�t designed to operate at peak performance twenty four hours a day. Anyone in industry knows that machines that have to work continuously need a lot of maintenance. When we are sleeping our body is healing and regenerating itself and we should wake up feeling refreshed and revitalized.

We can go without sleep for extended periods, but we can't do it indefinitely. The amount of sleep an individual needs varies a great deal, and there is no such thing as the right time to sleep. Obviously most people sleep at night, but if you are one of those folk that comes alive in the small hours, you might need to catch up with your sleep during the day.

A big part of healthy living is being comfortable with yourself. Don't be pressured into trying to attain a certain look, or push yourself down a career path you are not suited to. Constant worry about what you are doing will only have the opposite effect on your health. Don't get paranoid about your diet, about what toothpaste you should use or about expensive exercise equipment you need to buy.

Allow a common sense approach to dictate when you are making lifestyle choices, and remember, there is nothing wrong with compromise if it means your healthy lifestyle plan will work for you.

Moving On After Breast Cancer.

Breast cancer affects everyone in different ways and depending on the severity of each case, the recovery period varies greatly.

Breast cancer is a life-threatening disease and some very good work is being done to raise awareness and explore preventative measures. Unfortunately, there is still a downside.

This is the fact that these two words "breast cancer" strike fear into the hearts of most women. We all know that it is these dreaded words that sets the alarm bells ringing. The psychological aspect of this means that when a woman is diagnosed with breast cancer her stress levels skyrocket, putting an extra load on the body when she can cope with it the least.

It is of course her attitude towards these words that could be the greatest influence in her recovery.

Having survived breast cancer myself, I feel that some of the healing process is in part how you view the disease itself. As anyone who's read any of my previous articles will know, I did make considerable lifestyle changes to facilitate recovery. I'm also convinced that a big part of the process was down to the attitude I adopted towards cancer.

I had great faith in my surgeon and after the operation when he told me he had removed the cancer I believed him; totally. However, I also understood that the surgeon had done his part, now it was down to me to make sure the cancer didn't come back.

During the recuperation period there is plenty of time to think. It was during this time, that I was able to work out what I think was the cause of my breast cancer. It is a good time to find a strategy for post-breast cancer lifestyle. I had several challenges on a personal level; self-confidence being one of the issues. So I bought several books on the subject that were a real help in getting me back on track.

I've never liked the word remission, because it always seems to me that when someone says they are in remission, it is as if they expect the cancer to come back. The Law of attraction states that you will attract what you think about the most. If you spend your time expecting the cancer to come back, the odds are pretty good that it will. Of course I have absolutely no medical qualifications, and I don't profess to know the answers, I can only say what has worked for me.

I've always believed that stress caused my breast cancer, and part of the changes I've made to ensure the cancer didn't return was to eliminate as much stress from my life as I could.

For my part, I felt the best thing was to move on as soon as possible. So after a few mammograms and checkups that put me in the clear, I cut all ties with the breast cancer episode and got on with my life. I don't think about it very often, and I'm inclined to treat it as just another surgical procedure. It was a necessary procedure such as my appendectomy, but by not giving it too much credence, it means my breast cancer remains low on my list of things to think about.

Overcoming breast cancer is not easy, but advances in medical science help surgeons work miracles. Then it's down to the individual to decide what part their attitude can play in effecting a lasting cure.

My last piece of advice would have to be, set your self up to enjoy life. You know what they say, this isn't a dress rehearsal. This is it the real thing. Enjoy it now.

How and Where to Meet Eligible Men

So you're a woman looking for an eligible man. The bad news is so are millions of other women. The good news is by reading this you can get out there ahead of the pack. There are no secrets to meeting eligible men, it's just like getting anything else you want out of life, by good planning, strategy and action.

Most women who want to meet eligible men have no idea who they are looking for, they just assume eligible covers it. Wrong. You need to know what type of man you're looking for. What are you looking for? A husband, a meal ticket, a sugar daddy, lover, father figure, companion? The list is endless, so before you do anything else decide what you want or rather who you want. Rest assured the man you want is out there and if you don't get him someone else will. They won't necessarily be smarter or better looking than you, they will just be at the right place at the right time. By using a bit of initiative and intelligence you can learn to be in the right place more often and increase your chances of meeting the type of man you want.

Having decided on the type of man you are after you will have to take a good critical look at yourself, are you the type of woman that will attract his attention. We are all familiar with the old saying � looks are only skin deep� this sounds alright in theory, but the brutal fact is that when you meet a stranger they will sum you up in about ten seconds. No one is saying you've got to be beautiful, just that you must make the best of yourself. Work on the assumption that you've got just ten seconds to make an impression

It might be that you are quite happy with the way you look and behave, that's fine. The following tips are still worth a read considering how stiff the competition is out there.

Hair that is cared for shows, and a good cut and style always stands out. Hair that is coloured or tinted should be maintained to keep the gloss and shine.

Avoid wearing make up that is too heavy or badly applied. Find colours that suit you and if you're unsure how to use them get expert advice.

Overpowering perfume can be a turn off, a subtle hint can be far more effective. When shopping for a new perfume to find the one that suits you best try one or two at a time and leave them on for about half an hour before buying.

Keep your clothes and accessories clean and in good condition, scruffy shoes and bags for instance can spoil the overall effect. Conversely the right accessories can do much to enhance an otherwise ordinary outfit.

Personal hygiene is a must. Make sure your deodorant can perform under pressure, invest in good dental care equipment and generally aim for a healthy clean look.

Women generally assume that men have everything under control and it's always easier for them to make the first move. Nothing could be further from the truth. They have the same kind of inhibitions and hang-ups that women have, fear of rejection would be very high on the list. Add to that the pressure of having to make the first move and you get the idea of how daunting the whole business is and why some men just don't make that move. However things have changed and nowadays it's quite acceptable for a woman to make the first overture.

If you're out somewhere and people are dancing, it's quite acceptable for you to ask a man to dance. If the no holds barred approach isn't your style you can still make the first move but be more subtle about it. Let's suppose he's talking in a group of men and you want to ask him to dance. Approach the man so that there is no doubt about whom you've chosen and speak to the group as a whole. Say something like," Would you mind if I borrow this gentleman (guy) for the next dance, I'll bring him safely back.� No guy would like to refuse in front of others and because you've picked him he's likely to feel flattered.

Or how about: �I'm doing a survey on dance styles, can you spare a few minutes to test it out?� This sort of approach should be fun and most men will go along with it.

Maybe you want to approach a man who is on his own. What sort of thing could you say to him? First of all make sure he is definitely on his own, (ask him!) then let him know you are on your own too. Tell him you would like a couple of dances and ask him if he will partner you. Or you could try. �This music is just too good to sit it out, since you are on your own would you like to join me in a dance.

Let's suppose our next scenario is a busy caf� or restaurant and you've spotted a man you would like to get to know. If he is already seated and you're not, the approach is simple. Stop by his table, smile (very important) and say.� Would you mind if I share your table? You don't bite do you?� It is important to get them to respond to something right away, otherwise he could retreat behind a newspaper or report and not come out until you have gone.

If you are seated and he is not, catch his eye, smile, pull out a chair and say something like. �I only need one of these, you're welcome to the other three.�

A little bit of humour usually works because it is non threatening.

It's worth mentioning before we go any further that women are nearly always looking for men, while men are generally doing their own thing for any one of a million reasons. No matter what the leaders of the politically correct would have us believe, men and women are different. Not better or worse just different. Men are usually single minded, thus if for instance you spot a guy you like the look of when he's shopping for computer parts you will have to do some pretty fancy foot work to get his mind off computers and on to you.

So how would you go about it? Appeal to his ego, ask for help and advice.

Of course this will call for some quick thinking on your part, but you should become familiar with this, as there are no perfect circumstances for meeting that eligible man. The fact is you are probably seeing these men now but not taking that split second opportunity. So back to our man in the computer department. A simple �Excuse me", will get his attention, then look him in the eye, and smile, just a nice friendly smile, and deliver your line. �You look like a guy who knows about computers, can you tell me which of these modems would be the best buy?� Remember an appeal to his ego, a smile and a plea for help will work nine times out of ten.

We've covered a few simple methods of approach, now where are you most likely to meet the man of your choice? At the beginning we mentioned that you need to know what type of guy you are looking for. For instance if you are looking for an out-doors type, it is unlikely that you will meet him at an art gallery. Not impossible but improve your chances by attending venues that he is likely to frequent. Do your homework; go through the lists of clubs and organizations you think he's likely to go to. Find out when and where they meet and get your-self along to them

Bars and restaurants are pretty obvious places for meeting the opposite sex, however if you decide to go down this road make sure you find the right kind of bars that are frequented by the type of guy you wish to meet. Men that are financially secure and upwardly mobile are more likely to be found in the five star hotel bars, upmarket restaurants or sports clubs.

Most large city hotels will have convention facilities. Make it your business to know what's happening on the conference and convention front, as this is a good way to meet eligible men. For instance, if the hotel runs a convention for two hundred lawyers, most will be men and they will be in house for two or three days minimum. A great deal of their time will be taken up with meetings and seminars but in their free time they will be at a loose end and so frequent the bars and other facilities. People love to give you information, a friendly chat with a staff member will furnish you with all the information you need to be in the right place at the right time. Be warned though a married man is not an eligible man and when away from home they like to play. Make sure they are the quarry and not you.

A certain amount of eligible men still attend church but the chances of meeting one are greater if it's a big organization that holds plenty of gatherings and socials. In this sort of situation introductions are fairly easy since most members are only too willing to get everyone acquainted.

A good source of information for up coming events and meetings is the local newspaper. Quite often they run a � What's On.� Section in the weekend edition. It will generally cover a whole host of activities but if this sounds like just so much hard work, bear in mind that if you're really serious about meeting an eligible man it's going to take time and effort. However that said it is not necessary to have tunnel vision in your search for the right man, make it a point to enjoy yourself whatever the outcome of your expeditions.

Some types of holiday are ideal for meeting other singles. Specialized holidays such as safaris, trekking, walking holidays, adventure trips, scuba diving, all work on the group basis of usually around ten to fifteen people, who also want to meet other like minded people and have a good time. Holidays such as Club Med aim specifically at people who want to meet others and socialise. The single men here will defiantly be looking for a holiday romance.

Cruise ships always have a good percentage of singles but at the top end of the market they tend to be on the mature side. If you are yourself on the mature side then the pickings here can be slim and the competition fierce. A coach tour holiday may be a better bet when if all else fails you could enjoy the scenery.

While on the subject of holidays, airports are a good source of single men. You don't have to be going anywhere yourself, just be at an airport. Although men departing have time on their hands so it would be easy to strike up a conversation (see Bars and Cafes.) it will have to be very impressive to make him a) correspond with you while he's away; b) remember you when he gets back; c) visit this town again as he was just passing through or if you really set the world alight he may d) even miss his flight! It will be safer though maybe harder to scan the arrivals. Try sharing a taxi back to town, or if you were to hold up a name board it virtually gives you a licence to approach anybody. So you got the flight wrong and you are going back to town, would he like a lift?

Sport has always played a big part on the social scene, if you browse through your local telephone directory the list of sporting activities will astound you. In fact you will surprise yourself and discover sport's you never knew existed. If you actually enjoy sport so much the better but you don't have to participate in anything to enjoy all the social advantages. Clubs such as golf or sailing tend to have a large non-participating membership and vary from the run of the mill clubs to the very elite. If you are looking for a wealthy eligible man, you need to get yourself invited to a polo match or one of their socials, this will take more effort and not a little initiative. Equestrian clubs cover a huge range, how about dusting of your boots polishing up your line dancing and heading for the Rodeo, it's not all bull dust!

In the last few years work outs at the gym have become a way of life and people socialize at the gym the way they used to at dances fifty years ago. Though it is a good place to meet, there are a few pit falls. Some people are obsessed with the �body beautiful� and the only people they are going to look at are themselves. Fortunately they are easy to spot, so you can cross them off the list fairly quickly. The guy that is using the gym to just keep in shape won't be fanatical and you will know him, as he won't be honed to perfection. He will have time to smile or say hello, he won't spend all his time checking his muscle tone, he will be more laid back and relaxed about the whole thing.

As a last resort, if you can't see yourself making use of any of the forgoing information you could try a dating agency. However it's worth noting that the fees for the better agencies can be a little high with still no guarantee that you will meet someone who appeals to you.

Here are some points to remember when you set out to meet your eligible man.

� Do your homework. Give yourself the best possible chance by making sure you are at the right venue

� Wear the right clothes. Find out beforehand and if you are unsure don't be afraid to ask, most people are only too happy to help.

� Brush up on your conversational skills but more important, be a good listener.

� Don't drink alcohol on an empty stomach; if you are unsure of the eating arrangements have a snack before you go. Never drink too much

� Organize your travel arrangements to give yourself flexibility in the event that the unexpected happens.

� By all means give out your telephone number or email address, but be wary of disclosing your home address indiscriminately.

� If you think sex might be in the agenda carry a condom, remember accidents don't just happen, they are caused.

Now that you have the information at your fingertips it's up to you to go out and start putting some of the ideas into practise. It won't necessarily be easy but have fun anyway. If there is a final piece of advice that we can give you that will make a difference it is SMILE MORE. All men like a smile and it makes you look more attractive. Try it and see if it isn't true

Happy Hunting

Candles

Have you noticed how many candles are on display in just about every store you visit these days? Not so long ago buying candles involved a "search and find" mission. Then when you finally ran them to earth the choice was very limited.

Nowadays stores devote whole sections to candle display and indeed there are shops selling nothing but candles. So what has suddenly fuelled the desire to buy huge quantities of candles?

Candles have been used since the earliest of times. The first form of candle being very crude, and used for the single purpose of providing light. Right up until the early 1900s when electricity was discovered candles were still the main source of artificial light. They were also an early form of time keeping, with the candle burning evenly, they could be marked off in hourly sections.

The best candles were made from beeswax, however, since this was a limited and expensive commodity these candles would only be used by the clergy and the wealthy. A common form of candle used by the poor was made from tallow or mutton fat, these tended to give off black smoke as well as being very smelly.

Modern candles are likely to be made of paraffin, beeswax, bead wax and stearin. Stearin is a substance made from stearic acid, and although this sounds scary, it is harmless and nearly always used in conjunction with other waxes.

Modern candles contain hardeners, which increase burning time and stop the candle from sagging. New technology in manufacturing means we have far more choice in design and colour. However, you can still make candles using traditional methods and making candles for yourself or others is a rewarding, popular hobby.

Interest in essential oils and aromatherapy has driven the demand for scented candles and these are now available in just about every scent you can imagine. Perhaps because of their soothing and hypnotic effect, we tend to associate candles with peace and tranquillity, something most of us crave at some time or other. Candles can also help turn an ordinary event such as a bath or a dinner party into something special and it is this magical quality that keeps us coming back for more.

Candles have long been associated with religious ceremony, which may have helped to reinforce the belief that they are somehow imbued with mystical powers. Certainly, one can't help but be a little overawed by the tall beautiful candles used in churches or houses of worship. Although these tall candles can be purchased at a price, the smaller versions referred to as church candles remain very popular with consumers.

Floating candles are extremely popular at present, these are generally small and displayed in shallow dishes of water. On a still night they are very effective floating in ornamental garden ponds or in the swimming pool.

Some candles are veritable works of art, purchased for their beauty. Their owners having no intention of ever lighting them. Candle artists can often be seen demonstrating their skills at shopping malls and markets. They are a delight to watch and the intricate designs they produce are truly amazing.

Of course not all candles are produced to look beautiful, some; the anti- mosquito candles for example are extremely practical. These candles are impregnated with citronella and are designed to ward off insects and mosquitoes. They are very effective, but it is advised to use them in a well ventilated area, since the scent is usually fairly strong.

Naturally, candles� being a naked flame means an increased risk of fire. Care should always be used when burning candles of any sort. For outside areas such as barbecues for instance, candles in enclosed containers are a great idea. Awareness of fire risk has encouraged manufacturers of candles to come up with softer options, so the risk of fire is minimized.

Fads and fashions come and go but somehow, now that we've rediscovered candles it seems unlikely that it will be a short-term thing. If a little flame can bring joy, inspire hope and make us feel good, then long may candles light up our lives.

Who Needs a Life Coach?

A few years ago, the term �life coach� was still pretty new to most people, and it was hard for some people to get their head around the idea. In more recent times life coaching has become mainstream, with a lot more people understanding how it works.

Life coaching shouldn't be confused with counselling because the two are very different. Counselling is more about coming to terms with, and coping with events that have impacted on our lives, often with dramatic results that leave us unable to cope. Life coaching is all about moving forward, it can help to resolve issues or overcome problems that may be holding us back.

In today's society there isn�t always a network of family and friends available to advise and discuss issues with. People are happy to live alone and enjoy their own space, but this can create a vacuum where there is no one around with whom we can discuss ideas or share a problem.

By working together a life coach and their client can identify obstacles and work out a strategy that will give the client a satisfactory result. Of course since no two clients are the same, it is hard to measure results. However, it is the aim of the coach to ascertain the client's needs and to work with them through any problems to a fulfilment of their goal.

So who is the most likely sort of person to use a life coach? And what are the reasons for doing so? The answer to the first part is, just about anyone, from all walks of life and all age groups. The reasons are many and varied, some people have set goals or targets, they need to achieve, while others just want to work through an issue or problem that is holing them back. They may have just stalled in their life and not know why they haven�t moved on.

Basically the term life coach pertains to any issue that affects our life: Business, Sport, Arts, Education, Relationships, Family, Health, Lifestyle, the list is endless, a coach can help in all areas of life. A career or job takes up a large part of our life and many people use life coaching to help them with issues in this area.

Coaching is invaluable because it enables a client to vocalize their situation and helps them to create a clearer picture of what they want to achieve, what goals to set and then attain. A coach also helps a client to look at their situation from a different perspective so enabling the client to come up with more solutions or choice of outcome.

People now more than ever want to make lifestyle changes and if it's a major change, they don't always feel capable of tackling it on their own. By working with a coach, they can put together a plan and work through it. The key factor being that they are moving forward and not stagnating.

Today we are faced with multiple choices in everything, this is not a bad thing, but some people when faced with so many options get confused and end up going round in circles, achieving nothing. Working with a life coach can bring structure and organized thinking into the situation, thus helping the client to get to grips with their issues. A big part of the coaching process is getting the client to vocalize their thoughts, just by speaking about their issues can give them a definite shape and form, making them easier to deal with. Some clients find this very enlightening and are rather amazed at the results.

A life coach is entirely focused on their client�s situation. This means that the client has the undivided attention of the coach for the whole session. In an age when it is hard to get someone's attention for more than a few minutes this can be very important, listening to the client is one of the many skills that a coach focuses on. Unlike friends and family a coach is unbiased and sessions are entirely confidential.

Today we live life at a fast pace and we are more competitive than ever, because of this, the demand for life coaches will increase as more people realize that getting coached will help them to get a head. Life coaching is here to stay and those who embrace it will move forward confidently along their chosen path secure in the knowledge that they aren't alone.

Choosing a Weight Loss Programme

For anyone thinking of buying products or services related to weight loss, here are a few simple guidelines to help you get the best value and performance from your choice.

Obesity is fast becoming our number one health problem and as a result, weight loss products and services have become a multi million dollar industry. People desperately wanting to lose weight can be easily seduced by slick advertising and clever packaging offering fast results. With so much on offer it is hard to know where to start.

The best and first place to visit is your doctor, who can advise just how much weight you should lose and at what speed. Any medications you are on may have a bearing on what diets you could choose.

Before you part with your hard earned cash, take time to consider all of your options, and then decide what path you will follow. The types of things we are talking about here are;

Pills that suppress your appetite.

� Diet drinks designed to replace meals.

� Specially packaged diet meals.

� Exercise equipment to burn off fat.

� Companies that offer weight loss through a support system.

� Do it yourself via books that offer every diet under the sun...

You may need to or wish to follow more than one pathway; however you must be able to see yourself fulfilling the strategy to its end. Don�t be fooled, there is no easy way!!

Now you must spend more time researching the products or services within that category. Don�t get side tracked by fancy packaging, or pictures of glamorous models, look for information about the product.

All diets and weight loss programmes require time and effort. Once you come to terms with that you can get serious about shedding those extra pounds. When considering your options, think about your lifestyle, a special diet that takes a lot of preparation might not be suitable if you have tight schedules.

To be fair, most diets or weight loss programmes will work, but only if you work at them. Unfortunately it is all too easy to lose motivation and revert back to old habits. For this reason it is important that you understand exactly what is involved. Read the small print, especially if you are on any kind of medication.

Weight loss and exercise generally go hand in hand since as you lose weight the muscles will need toning up. Find out which companies can offer this sort of package and what advice and support they offer. If this is a weight loss academy or similar, pay them a visit, ask questions and meet the people you will be dealing with. Reputable companies are only too happy to give information and advice, nor will they pressure you into taking their programme.

Collect brochures and product information to read at your leisure, giving yourself time to understand and make comparisons. Friends always want to help and are full of advice but do your own due diligence, choose what is right for you, as you are the one who will be doing the work.

Beware of fad diets, they are usually aimed at quick results and are not suitable for the long term. They are of a very general nature and may not be right for your metabolism or energy use.

Taking the time and care to choose the correct weight loss system will pay dividends and offer you a better chance of success. Although appearance or wanting to look good is a big motivation for shedding weight the real benefit is improved health and vitality.

A great more detailed advice on diets and exercise is contained on this web site

Good Luck

What is Life Coaching?

Life coaching is a productive and results orientated dialogue between a coach and their client, on an issue specified by the client. That may be the definition, but what is it?

An individual will have an issue that they seem unable to move past, so they enlist the help of a life coach. The life coach will mentor their client through this stage so they can move on to better things.

The �Life� part of coaching is a broad term to encompass the many areas of life in general. It could include for example, personal issues such as moving house, changing jobs or improving a relationship. In business it could be problem solving, goal setting, time management, finances or directional. It may be blockages for writers, artists or musicians; or perhaps a more common aspect these days of trying to juggle career and family commitments.

The reasons a person chooses a life coach are many and varied, but all want to move on, even if they don't know where to! The coach will work with their client to develop a plan or strategy that will enable them to move towards the desired result.

A major skill for the coach is to be able to listen, this may seem easy enough, but it is a hard trait to find in most people. Everyone's situation is unique to them, so they want to talk to somebody who would be as committed to their problem as if it were their own.

How often have you heard the expression �Tell someone who cares� This is a sad indictment on modern society, but so true. People hardly have time to stop and listen, let alone help solve someone else's problem.

Because of this, life coaches have a valuable part to play in modern society. They can step into the breach and for each session the client will have the undivided attention of a trained professional. Coaches are not psychologists or counsellors; they do not deal in medical or trauma issues, though they can coach people through long term illness such as cancer. A coach's aim is to help, support and encourage their client to find answers and direction so that they may move forward successfully.

As success means different things to different people, it is the coach's job to define what the client wants in terms of a successful outcome. Life coaching is about overcoming obstacles and encouraging the individual to achieve their personal best. You don't even have to have a problem before consulting a coach; the best sports professionals still use a coach and mentor. So if you want to get ahead in life, get a Life Coach.

Lose Unwanted Kilos

Weight loss isn't just about looking good, a healthy body weight is crucial if you want to enjoy good health and longevity. A fit for life diet encompasses more than just the food you eat, it becomes a way of life.

Losing weight doesn't have to be a torturous regime that dominates your life and makes eating a misery. You can lose weight , get fit and enjoy yourself at the same time. What's more it won't cost a fortune.

Research has proved that 95% of people using fad diets regain the weight they lose. Weight that comes off through a sensible diet and exercise will stay off.

Get to know more about what you are eating, especially fast foods. Not all fast food is bad. Barbecue chicken for instance contains protein and vitamins, however the skin contains large amounts of fat and salt, so eat the meat and avoid the skin.

Part of the problem with fast food is that it is eaten between meals as a snack. Take a hard look at your eating habits, then make a decision on what is necessary and what is not. For example if you cut the amount of sugar in your coffee by half rather than none at all, you will still save about 200grams a week yet still be able to enjoy the coffee. Learn to recognize foods regarded as plumping agents,

Don't change all of your diet overnight. The body need time to adjust , especially if you are introducing more fruit and vegetables.

What you drink is as important as what you eat. Soft drinks, especially carbonated drinks, are notoriously high in kilojoules, and should be avoided altogether. Water is the best and healthiest thirst quencher, though you don't need to carry a bottle with you everywhere you go. If you are drinking socially then try juices as a mixer.

To keep your body toned while you ate losing weight, it is advisable to have an exercise programme in place. the easiest ,simplest form of exercise is walking, it is absolutely the perfect exercise. As well as decreasing your body fat it will help to decrease blood pressure, and strengthen bones.

Learn where most diets go wrong and avoid the mistakes by following the Holistic System. By implementing the measures found in the system, you can change not only how you look, but how you feel. Get fit for life

Improve your Sleep Patterns

Sleepless nights. At some time or another we have all experienced them and the odd sleepless night won�t do much harm. However if they become a regular occurrence, then you�ve got a problem. Not just the immediate affects of lack of concentration and poor judgment, but also the long term effect it has on your health.

While you are sleeping, your body switches to tick over mode. It begins repairs, healing and rejuvenates itself, so to do this maintenance you need sleep, and deep restful sleep is the best sleep of all. Learn how to get that good nights sleep every night

There isn�t just one sort of sleep, and our holistic approach will teach you the advantages of Power Napping, as well as other relaxation techniques

Good sleep patterns will help you become fit for life